How to be present with a grieving person

Being Present with Someone Who Is Grieving: The Quiet Gift of Listening

Grief can be incredibly isolating. When someone is hurting, what they often need most is not advice or solutions—but someone who will simply sit with them in the pain. Someone who isn’t afraid of the quiet. Someone who can hold space.

Being present with someone who is grieving isn’t about having the right words. It’s about showing up with your whole heart.

It might look like:

  • Sitting beside them without filling the silence
  • Letting tears fall without rushing to wipe them away
  • Allowing stories to be told again and again—even if they’re hard to hear
  • Saying “I don’t know what to say, but I’m here with you.”

When you listen, really listen, it tells the grieving person:

You matter.

Your pain matters.

You are not alone.

Active listening is one of the greatest kindnesses you can offer. It means being fully engaged—not thinking about what to say next, not mentally solving a problem, but just being with the other person. It looks like eye contact, nodding gently, letting them take their time, and responding with warmth rather than fixing.

You can say things like:

  • “Thank you for sharing that with me.”
  • “You matter. Your loss matters. You are not alone.”

You don’t need to compare. You don’t need to redirect the conversation. And you don’t need to make it better—because some things can’t be made better. 

At Written Hugs Designs, we believe there is so much strength in softness. A card, a word, a listening ear—they all say, You are not alone. Grief is a long journey, but nobody should have to walk it in silence.

So if you’re wondering how to show up for someone grieving, start here:

Sit with them.

Listen with your heart wide open.

And let your presence speak what words cannot.

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